Self Harm
Self harm is when a person causes physical pain to themselves.
It can include cutting, biting, scratching, burning and many other ways.
There can be many reasons that a person self harms for example they could be getting bullied, experiencing a loss, discrimination, stress, disability's etc.
People can self harm as a release and its a way they cope with overwhelming emotional pain.
It is a difficult issue to start talking about and not a lot of people understand why someone may self harm.
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There are many different ways people can intentionally harm themselves, such as:
cutting or burning their skin
punching or hitting themselves
poisoning themselves with tablets or toxic chemicals
misusing alcohol or drugs
deliberately starving themselves (anorexia nervosa) or binge eating (bulimia nervosa)
excessively exercising
People often try to keep self-harm a secret because of shame or fear of it being seen. They may cover up their skin and avoid discussing the problem.
It's often up to close family and friends to notice when somebody is self-harming. They should approach the subject with care and understanding.
It can also include behaviours that have some level of suicide intent, such as overdoses.
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1. Educate Yourself
Understanding self-harm and its underlying causes is crucial. Learn about the reasons why people self-harm, such as coping with emotional pain, feeling a sense of control, or expressing feelings they cannot put into words.
2. Approach with Compassion
Approach the person with kindness and empathy. Let them know you care about them and are there to support them. Avoid being judgmental or critical.
3. Listen Without Judgment
Offer a safe space for them to talk about their feelings. Listen actively and without interrupting. Acknowledge their pain and validate their feelings without offering immediate solutions or judgments.
4. Encourage Professional Help
Gently encourage them to seek professional help, such as talking to a therapist, counselor, or doctor. Professional support is essential for addressing the underlying issues causing self-harm.
5. Offer Practical Support
Be Available: Let them know you are there for them and can be contacted whenever they need someone to talk to.
Help Them Find Resources: Assist them in finding mental health resources, such as helplines, support groups, or mental health professionals.
Create a Safety Plan: Help them develop a plan for what to do when they feel the urge to self-harm. This might include distraction techniques, reaching out to friends or family, or using coping mechanisms like journaling or engaging in a hobby.
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You may feel like self harming is your only way to feel better or feel able to cope, but there are other ways.
Seek Professional Help
Therapists and Counselors: Find a mental health professional who can help you understand the underlying causes of your self-harm and develop healthier coping strategies.
Doctors: Talk to your primary care doctor about your self-harm. They can refer you to appropriate mental health services and provide medical care if needed.
Identify Triggers
Understand Your Triggers: Keep a journal to track your emotions, situations, and thoughts that lead to self-harm. Identifying patterns can help you anticipate and manage triggers.
Avoid or Prepare for Triggers: Once you know what triggers your self-harm, you can take steps to avoid those situations or prepare coping mechanisms in advance.
Develop Healthy Coping Mechanisms
Physical Activity: Exercise can reduce stress and improve your mood.
Creative Outlets: Engage in activities like drawing, painting, writing, or playing music to express your emotions.
Relaxation Techniques: Practice deep breathing, meditation, or yoga to manage stress and calm your mind.
Build a Support Network
Friends and Family: Reach out to trusted friends or family members who can provide emotional support and understanding.
Support Groups: Join support groups where you can share your experiences and learn from others who are facing similar challenges.
Create a Safety Plan
Distraction Techniques: Develop a list of activities that can distract you when you feel the urge to self-harm, such as watching a movie, reading, or going for a walk.
Coping Strategies: Have a list of alternative coping strategies ready, like squeezing an ice cube, tearing up paper, or using a stress ball.
Emergency Contacts: Keep a list of emergency contacts, including friends, family, and mental health professionals, that you can reach out to in times of crisis.
Practice Self-Compassion
Be Kind to Yourself: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend in a similar situation.
Positive Affirmations: Use positive affirmations to counter negative thoughts and remind yourself of your strengths and worth.
Educate Yourself
Learn About Self-Harm: Understanding why you self-harm and the impact it has on your body and mind can help you find healthier ways to cope.
Read Self-Help Books: Consider reading self-help books focused on managing self-harm and building emotional resilience.
Limit Access to Harmful Items
Remove Tools: Safely dispose of or limit access to items you use to self-harm.
Replace with Safe Alternatives: Keep safe alternatives nearby that can help you manage the urge without causing harm.
Focus on Your Goals
Set Small Goals: Set achievable goals to help you reduce self-harm, such as going one day, then one week, without self-harming.
Celebrate Progress: Celebrate your successes, no matter how small. Acknowledge your efforts and progress.
Consider Medical Attention
Treat Injuries: If you have injuries from self-harm, seek medical attention to ensure they are properly treated and do not become infected.
Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness Exercises: Engage in mindfulness exercises to stay present and manage overwhelming emotions.
Grounding Techniques: Use grounding techniques, such as focusing on your breath or engaging your senses, to stay connected to the present moment.
Remember, recovery from self-harm is a journey, and it's okay to seek help and support along the way. You deserve care, compassion, and understanding, and taking steps to help yourself is a powerful and courageous decision.
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Physical Activities:
Go for a run or walk
Do some yoga or stretching exercises
Dance to your favorite music
Try a new sport or workout routine
Creative Outlets:
Draw, paint, or color in a coloring book
Write in a journal or try creative writing
Play a musical instrument or listen to music
Craft or build something with your hands
Mindfulness and Relaxation:
Practice deep breathing exercises
Meditate or use guided imagery
Try progressive muscle relaxation
Take a warm bath or shower
Sensory Distractions:
Squeeze an ice cube
Hold a cold object against your skin
Use a stress ball or fidget toy
Run your hands through different textures, like sand or rice
Engaging Activities:
Watch a movie or TV show
Read a book or magazine
Play a video game or do a puzzle
Try a new recipe or bake something
Social Connections:
Call or text a friend or family member
Join a support group or online community
Spend time with a pet
Volunteer for a cause you care about
Self-Care:
Pamper yourself with a face mask or manicure
Write positive affirmations or a gratitude list
Plan a fun outing or activity for the future
Organize or clean your living space
Grounding Techniques:
Name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste
Focus on your breathing, counting each breath in and out
Hold a comforting object, like a soft blanket or stuffed animal
Remember, different distractions work for different people. It may take some experimentation to find which techniques are most effective for you.
There is no shame in asking for help, we all need some from time to time. Talk to a trusted adult like a teacher or parent, you can also talk to your friends.